I'm a Friend

     Most days when I’m home for lunch, I prefer to eat in the living room and turn on Friends. I heard that watching reruns of a familiar show is calming. If anything, it’s most definitively a nice distraction from the news. Today while watching a clip of two of the main characters, I realized how much my personality resembles … wait … no need to rush this. 

     Right after this “ah-ha” moment, I mentally categorized all of the shows main characters. Ross is book-smart, a hopeless romantic, and a bit goofy. Rachel is gorgeous, flirty, and a tad self-centered. Chandler’s sarcastic humor and self-deprecation steals the scene every time! I’m sure most would agree that Phoebe is quirky, spontaneous, and downright lovable. Joey is a loyal friend and the ultimate stud with a “less-than” intellect. Lastly, Monica is a bossy clean-freak who’s a bit high strung and driven. Each character is easily identifiable and brings a different perspective. Wouldn’t life be simpler if everyone you met announced right up front, “Hi, I’m a Rachel,” or “I’m a Joey.” If only it was that easy. 

     Today’s episode reminded me of the complexity of human nature. Here’s a recap of that conversation: 

 Monica: “I can’t believe you tried to cut me out. Why Phoebe, why?” 

 Phoebe: “It was right after we were living together and you were driving me crazy. Okay, you were really controlling, and compulsive, and shrill.” 

 Monica: (In a shrill voice) “Well, I’m still all those things.” 

 Phoebe: “You’re also so generous, and kind, and scrappy.” 

 Monica: “I am scrappy.” 

Phoebe: “Exactly. No matter what I tried to do I couldn’t keep you out of my life. Out of all the people I cut out, you were the only one who ever clawed her way back in.” 

Monica: “Because I’m scrappy.” 

     Though Monica has been pigeonholed as rigid and unrelenting, Phoebe reminds us there’s always more to a human psyche. We can’t simply just be “a Ross” or “a Chandler” because there’s always more. We each have a back story, a life of experiences, successes and failures that shape who we are at a given time. Trying to capture the essence of an individual, whether for yourself or another, can be trying and tricky because we are constantly evolving and changing. 

     What I find interesting is my big reveal of which Friends character I resemble took a sharp left turn as I wrote this today. Yes, I’m undoubtedly tidy and particular like Monica. But I’m also silly like Phoebe and nerdy like Ross. I have a sarcastic sense of humor like Chandler, and I desire superficial pleasures like clothes, shoes, and purses, just like Rachel. As for Joey, all I can say is we both LOVE pizza! So there you have it. Who do I resemble? All of them!