Second Choice or Chance Opportunity?

 

There have been several times in my life when I was told flat out, “You were my second choice.” For some people, this may be crushing news. For me, it lit a fire. I was on a mission to prove that as a “second choice,” I could work just as hard, if not more so, than those at the front of the line.

     The first time this happened to me, I was in eighth grade. I had been going to volleyball practice every day after school that week, hoping to make the team.  My math teacher was the volleyball coach. She put the list of those who made the cut on her classroom door. Below the roll of the chosen, there were two names listed with the message, “Please see me.” I was one of the names listed at the bottom. I walked up to my coach’s desk, and she took me into the hallway to talk.

     “I see a lot of potential in you,” she said. “I think if you work really hard, and improve your skills, you can join the team.” I accepted the challenge and excelled! As a matter of fact, when the season began, my coach chose me as a starter along with five other girls. In case you’re wondering, the other girl listed at the bottom of the cut along with me decided to pass on the coach’s offer.  

I'm the little one in the front row, 2nd from the left.

     It’s that motivation, that internal drive that has kept me opening closed doors. Call it determination, ambition, or plain ole stubbornness; I just refuse to give up. I tried out for the cheerleading squad in 7^th, 8^th, and 9^th grade. All three years, I was selected from a group of teachers as their “Top 10.” The Top 10 then tried out in front of the student body and they selected the final six cheerleaders for that year’s squad. I never made the team. You’d think after I wasn’t picked in 7^th and 8^th grade I’d just give up. Nope. Not me. It’s not in my DNA.

     Many years later, I applied for a job working for the Air Force as a Deputy Commander. I had just completed a graduate degree, and on paper, I met all the criteria for the position. I knew it was a long-shot, and I heard rumors (think small town gossip) that some naysayers didn’t expect the Air Force Personnel Center would select me as a qualified candidate. Well, they did. That means I was now on the short list of candidates for the job. Fast forward a month, and I was selected for the position.

     I met with my new boss, the Commander, and the first thing he said to me was, “You weren’t my first choice.” Wowsa…how’s that for smashing someone’s confidence with one simple sentence! I played it cool and hid my shock, though I did appreciate his honesty and no-bullshit attitude. He explained that there was another candidate with more qualifications than I had, but he accepted another job. So, I was next on his list. I was determined to prove to him he wouldn’t regret his decision. We worked together for a year before he was transferred. That year for me was all about professional growth. I accepted new challenges without hesitation and did my best to prove my worth as his “number two.”

     I saw a story on the news a couple of days ago about country singer, Maren Morris. They said she tried out for American Idol in 2008. She said she “didn’t make it past first round cattle call.” In 2016, the Country Music Association named her the New Artist of the Year. Now, that’s a perfect example of someone who refuses to settle or give up.  

     These experiences can either chip away at your confidence level and self-esteem, or build a strong character, one that can take rejection, pick up the pieces, and move on. For me, it’s just another opportunity to prove to myself that I am worthy, I can make the cut, and it all begins with effort and determination. The next time you’re given the choice to quit, or push ahead to see what could happen, why not take a chance? It may just be an opportunity of a lifetime!